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Ultra Sheen/Transcript

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UltraSheen

I'm telling you, bologna is made by tiny bologna elves. 00:07:23 And I'm telling you, bologna grows on mighty bologna trees. 00:07:28 Does not! 00:07:29 Does, too! 00:07:30 (helicopter rotors whirring) JIMMY: (on Goddard's speaker) Hi, guys. 00:07:38 Oh, no! 00:07:38 Goddard's eaten Jimmy. 00:07:40 JIMMY: Not quite-- I'm on the lab speakerphone. 00:07:43 I want you to get your favorite video games and come over. 00:07:47 I've got an invention you'll love, and it... 00:07:50 (pants) How'd you get here so quick? 00:07:53 I had a copy ofUltra Lord Versus Robo-Fiend Mega Battle in my pocket. 00:07:57 And you carry that around all the time? 00:08:01 Oh, I don't need to. 00:08:02 I can stop whenever I want. 00:08:03 I don't have a problem! 00:08:05 Not today, you don't. 00:08:06 How would you, Sheen, like to fight side by side with Ultra Lord, live and in person? 00:08:12 (gasps) Jimmy! 00:08:15 I love you. 00:08:17 Behold the glory that is... 00:08:19 the Neutronic Game Pyramid. 00:08:23 Ooh, pointy. 00:08:25 It actually deconstructs your particles and inserts you into your favorite video game. 00:08:29 So as soon as Carl gets here... 00:08:31 SHEEN: No, no. 00:08:32 I want to fight side by side with Ultra Lord now. 00:08:35 Every moment I'm not fighting side by side with Ultra Lord is tearing me apart. 00:08:40 Okay, okay, okay. 00:08:40 Insert the game, then stand on the transference pad. 00:08:47 Oh, one more thing. 00:08:48 This pyramid is only a prototype, so in order to exit the game, you have to win. 00:08:51 So just to be on the safe side, I'll start you out on Level 1. 00:08:54 As Ultra Lord said in episode 62, "Love, Valor, Ultra Lord!" Fractalize me. 00:09:04 (machine whirrs) (hisses) (Sheen shouts) (grunts) Awesome-- I'm actually on the Ultra Planetoid. 00:09:15 ULTRA LO: Greetings, life-form. 00:09:17 I'm about to engage Robo-Fiend in pitched combat. 00:09:20 Would you like to be my Battle Buddy? 00:09:24 B-b-battle Buddy? M-me? 00:09:27 Answer quickly. 00:09:28 My ultra senses tell me that Robo-Fiend is approaching. 00:09:32 At last. 00:09:33 My long years of watching TV have paid f. 00:09:36 Let evil tremble, for none can withstand the awesome might that is Ultra Lord and his new Battle Buddy-- Ultra Sheen!! 00:09:52 (roars) (whirring) Okay, that couldhave gone better. 00:09:58 JIMMY:Oh, Sheen. 00:09:59 Now he's trapped in there. Oh, well... 00:10:01 I'm sure he can't possibly lose twice on Level 1. 00:10:04 SHEEN (on monitor): Hey, look at me. 00:10:06 I'm head-growing-out- of-the-ground man. 00:10:09 Or maybe I'd better give him a hand. 00:10:19 (grunts) Hey, what happened? 00:10:23 I'm free. 00:10:25 That's because I pressed "Reset." I couldn't let you get stuck in here. 00:10:29 Sorry, Jimmy. 00:10:30 Seeing Ultra Lord in all his shining glory distracted me so. 00:10:34 ULTRA LORD: Greetings, life-forms. 00:10:35 I'm about to engage Robo-Fiend in pitched combat. 00:10:39 Would you like to be my Battle Buddies? 00:10:42 He always says that. 00:10:43 Get ready, Jimmy. 00:10:44 Robo-Fiend's about to get ultra whipped. 00:10:47 CARL: My favorite video game? 00:10:50 Oh, no, no, no, it's too much pressure. 00:10:53 Ninja Llamas in Space?--No. 00:10:56 Llama Versus Mega-Dingo? 00:10:57 (gasps): Of course. 00:11:00 Llamapalooza. 00:11:02 Oh, I love you most of all. 00:11:10 (clanking) (whirring) Prepare to taste photons, Cosmic Avengers. 00:11:17 Okay, Sheen, here's the plan... 00:11:20 Jimmy, please. 00:11:21 May I remind you this is Level 1? 00:11:23 (clanks) (blasts) (wind whistles) (thuds) (clanks to a stop) He's all yours, Encased Crusader. 00:11:46 Hey, Robo-Fid. 00:11:48 Hold this for me. 00:11:49 (thuds) (wind whistling) Oh, Sheen, that was awesome. 00:11:55 The scent of victory is pungent. 00:11:57 (sniffs) (quietly): Or is that just me? 00:12:00 (panting) Hey, Jimmy, the lab door was open, so I came right in and... oh, wow! 00:12:06 It'sRobo-Fiend Mega Battle featuring Jimmy and Sheen. 00:12:10 This must be the surprise Jimmy had. 00:12:14 Hey, Jimmy, where are you? 00:12:16 Can I play your new game? 00:12:18 I guess he went to the "little inventor's" room. 00:12:21 Well, I'm sure he won't mind. 00:12:24 Level 1? 00:12:25 Come on, that's for babies... (snorts) Let's try Level 7. 00:12:33 (Sheen shouts, grunts) (whirrs) But, but, but... I don't get it. 00:12:40 We won the game. 00:12:40 We should have exited already. 00:12:43 Greetings, life-forms. 00:12:44 I'm about to engage Robo-Fiend in pitched combat. 00:12:47 Would you like to be my Battle Buddies? 00:12:50 Leapin' leptons-- the game has reset itself! 00:12:52 ULTRA LORD: Answer quickly. 00:12:53 My ultra senses tell me that Robo-Fiend is approaching. 00:12:58 No problemo. 00:12:59 I can kick Robo-Fiend's Level 1 butt all day long. 00:13:03 (Robo-Fiend clanks) (roaring) (quietly): Or not. 00:13:09 Taste magma, Cosmic Avengers. 00:13:12 (roars) (screams) Jimmy, something's wrong. 00:13:17 Robo-Fiend doesn't get a Magma Cannon until Level 5. 00:13:22 Someone must have raised the game level, but who? 00:13:26 BOTH: Carl! 00:13:27 JIMMY: Carl, stop!-- it's not a game! 00:13:30 We're really in danger! 00:13:32 Wow, the characters know my name... (snorts) Talk about interactive. 00:13:37 Hmm, I wonder if this game has the Robo-Fiend Atomic Breath feature? 00:13:42 (whirring) (huffing) (laughs evilly) (roaring) JIMMY (groaning): Atomic breath. 00:13:55 (choking): Gross. 00:13:57 (Robo-Fiend roars) ULTRA LORD: Behind me, Battle Buddies. 00:14:04 Don't worry, Jimmy. 00:14:05 We're okay as long as Ultra Lord's shields hold. 00:14:08 Hmm, those shields look kind of strong. 00:14:12 I'd better drain them. 00:14:15 (whooshing) (clatters) (roaring) (Ultra Lord groans) That's going to leave an ultra bruise. 00:14:29 (crashes) Ultra Lord. 00:14:32 No...! 00:14:36 Oh, yeah, I'm bad. 00:14:37 (shouts): I defeated Ultra Lord!! 00:14:40 (quietly): And yet... I feel strangely empty inside. 00:14:45 Maybe it's because this game doesn't have any llamas. 00:14:49 It's all my fault. 00:14:51 I'm a ba-a-a-ad Battle Buddy. 00:14:55 If only we had more power. 00:14:56 You'd have to capture an Ultra Crystal to get a mega level power boost. 00:15:02 Ultra Crystals-- of course! 00:15:03 Okay, Sheen, can you distract Robo-Fiend for me? 00:15:06 Leave it to me, Battle Buddy. 00:15:11 SHEEN: Hey, Robo-loser. 00:15:12 Is that the rotting carcass of a Rigilian Mold Bat I smell? 00:15:17 Or is that just your Robo-funk? 00:15:19 (clanks, roars) (shouts) (hissing) (booming) If I were a game programmer, where would I hide an Ultra Crystal? 00:15:33 (hissing) (shouts) (shouts) (clunk) Of course. 00:15:39 It's always under the stalagmites. 00:15:44 (laughs evilly) Sheen-- catch. 00:15:48 I got it, I got it. 00:15:52 (clanks, whirrs) Fool! 00:15:55 You are helpless before one who now and forever shall be known as... 00:16:00 Mega Robo-Fiend. 00:16:04 You might think about counseling. 00:16:05 I'm picking up some self-esteem issues and it's... (screams) Ah,Llamapalooza. 00:16:14 (machine whirrs) (hissing) ROBO-FIEND: Now face the fury of my Opti-Blasts. 00:16:20 (bouncy music playing) What the...? 00:16:23 (music playing) Sheen, where are we? 00:16:31 Ride, Carl. 00:16:32 Ride like the wind. 00:16:33 There must be another Ultra Crystal around here someplace. 00:16:37 (grunts) (hisses) Yes. 00:16:46 Sheen. 00:16:47 Heads up. 00:16:48 (whiffling) (Sheen grunts) Power coursing through my cuticles. 00:16:56 Power enough to transform Ultra Sheen into... 00:17:00 Mega Ultra Sheen! 00:17:07 (both zapping) Our power is too evenly matched. 00:17:10 Good thing I know your one true weakness. 00:17:14 (roars): No. 00:17:16 Yes. 00:17:16 The European director's cut ofUltra Lord,episode 317 reveals that his arch-enemy Robo-Fiend is... 00:17:24 lactose-intolerant. 00:17:25 Taste llama milk, Star Destroyer. 00:17:27 No, I'm allergic. 00:17:29 Don't. 00:17:30 (groans) (explosion) Well done, Battle Buddies. 00:17:37 Join me again next time in the never-ending battle against evil. 00:17:43 (crashes) (groans) Phew. 00:17:50 There's no way I'm ever, ever playing that game again till next week. 00:17:53 Well, I guess my prototype needs a little more work. 00:17:56 It's a good thing you came through with those llamas, Carl. 00:18:00 You know, we, we... Carl? 00:18:02 Jimmy, look. 00:18:03 CARL: Llamapalooza. 00:18:04 Llamapalooza, yay. 00:18:05 (music playing) We've got to get him out right away. 00:18:09 Maybe we'll let him stay there till after lunch. 00:18:12 Okay. Got any bologna? 00:18:14 CARL: Llamapalooza. 00:18:15 (Carl singing and laughing) Hey.

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